Second Taco Tuesday without you, tried going to Green lemon tonight...the hostess said it would be 45 minutes for a table...which made me think of you because they never give the right estimate on the time. Which was the one thing that made you frustrated with this restaurant. Didn't really feel you today with me, and maybe thats why I cried most of the day and wanted to sleep all day. You were in my dreams today and I didn't want to wake up. At least in my dreams I can feel you and hear your voice, why would I want to wake up from that?
The one thing that's been on my mind is that I'm 21.... I have the rest of my life to miss you...and grieve....Though everyone says that life goes by so fast but my God....the rest of my life without you is a very long time. It's weird to think that I'm going to be loving your memory, and all the memories of you and I. I feel like I'm going to be that miserable woman that can't be surrounded by happy people. I don't want to laugh or even smile, I don't want to live my life without you.
I love telling people our story of how we met cause not many people know... That's the way you're going to live by all of our stories that we have of you, Joey. Which in my case I'm the luckiest one because I have the stories of our love. A love that not many people will ever get to experience in their lifetime. I knew the first night that you and I were going to be forever.
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As many people know Joey and I worked together. Totally scandalous; Manager and server relationship which is so typical in a restaurant. Being 19 and him 30 when we first started seeing each other (secretly) I was trying not to be that server where he simply forgets about...but I knew after one night, that it was not going to be like that. Before the first night that we expressed our feelings for each other, he started scheduling me closing shifts when he would close, so not obvious. After closing we would go and workout because only in Gainesville would there be a 24/7 gym. Those nights we spent hours running and watching HGTV and getting to know each other and than we started going on our not yet "dates" to Sonny's during the day before we would go to work. All this time spent with each other we still never told each other our feelings to each other until sometime around October 18th, so there were 3 months of hanging out every day. On Mondays it was bowling night, so I closed one Monday and I knew he was going bowling with everyone from work, well by midnight he was obviously drunk, soooooo I got there and started drinking. It was the first time we had been around each other while we were drinking so obviously we started flirting a little bit more...I'll never forget the look in his eyes when he would look at me. Next thing I know, Joey is running outside to his car, so what do I do...run after him and ask him "What do you think you're doing" and he told me to get in the car. With the drink still in my hand, I did. (FYI we still have that glass) Than he starts driving, we get to the stop light and he grabs my left hand and holds it and kisses it and tells me we were going to be just fine. Obviously with a few drinks in me, I'm looking at him like a crazy person (obviously my heart is beating) Until we got to his house, he never let go of my hand. When we got to his place, I sat down on his couch and looked at him and told him that nothing was going to happen that night because one, I wasn't that type of girl and two he was my manager. He looked at me and he said he knew and at that moment I dared him to kiss me, and he grabbed my face and kissed me. We woke up the next morning, and I couldn't believe that I was laying in the same bed as him, worst part is I still had my Nikes on. He threw on different clothes and this time was the first time I saw him in normal clothes and he wore his glasses. I never found him more sexy than when he wore his glasses. He took me back to my car but on the way he stopped at Mcdonalds and bought me a sweet tea with extra ice...at that moment I knew it was game over and that he was the one. Thats where our story began and the love lives on..
Joey he is going to live through me, telling our stories. He touched so many hearts and I was that special person that he wanted to spend the rest of his life. How lucky am I, to be able to say that..
Week One, down...so many more to go..
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